Self love is a concept we talk about frequently. We understand its importance and aspire to become one with it, but so often we fall short and fail to achieve it. I often see a lot of shame around the idea of loving yourself, as some see it as being conceited or narcissistic rather than confident and happy with yourself. There is so much confusion about what it truly means to love yourself, which is a bit disappointing because I genuinely feel that the meaning of life is to reach your divine self, full of love within and acceptance.
So what exactly does self love mean and how do we attain it? If you were to look it up, the definition of self love is "the instinct by which one's actions are directed to the promotion of one's own welfare or well-being, especially an excessive regard for one's own advantage". It is exactly that and even deeper, I think. Self love is dynamic appreciation and support for our own physical, spiritual, and psychological growth as individuals. It's not black or white, as each individual faces different setbacks and victories, and for some it's easier to attain than others. It grows and changes as we grow and change, and it focuses us back to the most important person in our life. Ourself.
No single person has all of the answers and rules to finding love within, but there are approaches you can take that will potentially help you on your journey.
As I am coming of age and facing the struggles of transitioning into an adult, I've been doing a lot of deep thinking about this concept. I am still growing, changing, and learning. I am not perfect whatsoever, but my findings have provided me with a newfound urge to incorporate some things into my life to help guide me on my own journey to self love.
Here are a few things I have gathered:
1. Know yourself. Become more mindful. It’s easy to be influenced by other people, especially the media, but knowing exactly who you are and what you deserve will help you remain true to yourself and bring you peace within.
2. Maintain good self care. Set aside time in your everyday schedule to do something that makes you happy. Find a way to incorporate more healthy foods into your diet to fuel your body, take a few extra hours in the morning to sleep in, or maybe when you wake up do a quick 15 minute workout to get your heart pumping. All of these sound like such basic things, but you'd be surprised how many of us overlook the importance of having them in our day to day lives.
3. Praise your victories, no matter how small. It's so important to acknowledge when you do something good or beneficial for yourself and well being, even if it's as little as feeling a bit more confident in wearing no makeup, or wearing something out that you used to feel more insecure in. Don't downplay the positive progress you make in your journey, no matter how small it may seem. Every step that you take in your journey brings you closer to inner peace. You're getting better everyday and that is something to be proud of.
4. Be compassionate towards yourself. Forgive yourself. I think this is one of the most important things to take out of this blogpost, because without even noticing we beat ourselves up over things that we shouldn't. So many of us are too hard on ourselves and we expect so much. But we need to sit back and remind ourselves that we are trying our hardest, that it is okay to mess up, and that what we are feeling is completely valid. We are all human and have human tendencies, we must accept that we will make mistakes. Maybe instead of looking in the mirror and saying what you don't like about yourself, say something that you appreciate about yourself. Not just appearance wise, but internally, or spiritually. Be kind to yourself because it's what you deserve.
5. Live on purpose. There is a reason you are here on this earth in this very lifetime, so live in the now. Even if you feel like your purpose isn’t crystal clear, maybe you don't know what you want to do when you grow up or what you even want out of life, you HAVE one. We are all here for different reasons and we are all on different journeys, but our purpose everyday is to live a meaningful and self loving life.
As I said earlier, I am still lost and struggling, but these are things that I've been trying to remind myself everyday while I continue to educate myself. I hope it helps you in any way possible. Feel free to comment below about your journey or your thoughts on self love, I want it to be a safe place to talk about our journeys together if you wish to do so. Thank you so much for reading...
See you soon, Love to all❥
Alexa