we exist

how hard is it to be a girl
i am tired
she is tired
we are always tired
yet how beautiful is it to be a girl
and the bonds we make mending each others clipped wings
when we are expected to fly
what a tragic yet beautiful love story
where sisterhood is sacred
sisterhood is safe
where i can look to my fellow girls for safety
from the people
from the men
who scare me
why does he always scare me
sisterhood is safe
i can see it so clearly
i can feel it so clearly
the warmth
the strong ties that connect us so deeply
like i can feel you and your pain inside of me
without having ever physically felt it
a man will never feel what we feel
a man will never take away what we have together
though they think everything that is ours
is theirs too
it is not theirs it never was theirs
we do not belong to them
we fight and we fight and we exist and we exist
our fight is our story
our story is ours to tell
unedited and unfabricated
the truth
how our delicate wings were clipped
everyday we fight
we feel need to justify our existence and apologize
justify our existence and apologize
I remember
so vividly like it was yesterday
it was yesterday and everyday before yesterday
little girl
apologize for wearing too much
apologize for not wearing enough
apologize for speaking too loud
apologize for not speaking
sorry feels like my name like who i am
i apologize like it is breathing
for so long
i thought it was my fault
i apologized again
it is not my fault it never was my fault
the world failed me
my mother
my grandmother
and all women before us
the world
the men
they whisper in my mind
our minds
apologize for taking up space
so we fight and we exist and keep fighting and we keep existing
we look deeply into each others eyes
the eyes of girls
the eyes of safety
we hold hands
we grow our wings back stronger
we fight and we fight
we exist and we exist

by alexa fajardo

Holiday Outfits

I am always so inspired by the color scheme and patters that the holiday season always brings out, so I put together a few outfits to be festive. I really hope that these outfits help you in any way, especially if you are struggling trying to find something to wear to a holiday event. Enjoy!

cozy night in

 holiday festives with friends

 holiday party

 family dinner

 formal gathering

I hope that you really enjoyed these outfits, leave me a comment if you would like to know where any of these pieces are from. Have a lovely holiday, I love you all!

Love to all❥

Alexa

Harry Styles on the Big Screen

While most of 2016 for Harry has been very low key, especially in comparison to his work load for the past five years with One Direction, what's in store for 2017 will blow us all away. Not only is Harry a talented and known singer, songwriter, fashion icon, and activist, he also will be staring in his first ever feature film directed by Christopher Nolan, called Dunkirk. His acting debut will premiere July 21, 2017 as a soldier named Alex in in the midst of evacuating Dunkirk.

A few days ago the first trailer for Dunkirk was released and we saw Harry as we have never seen him before. His intenseness and emotion, especially in his drowning scene, had me speechless and in tears. Seeing him amongst such known A-list actors is so surreal, leaving me with a great proud feeling. All social media was going crazy for the short 10 seconds or so of screen time that he had in the trailer, but let me tell you, those 10 seconds did not disappoint.

As a long time supporter of Harry, I have never once doubted his abilities in any aspect. I think he was born to entertain, whether that is on stage singing or acting in a movie, it is truly his calling. Although I wish it was, this is not the opinion of the entire world (ugh). Many are arguing that he only was casted for the role because of his name, which I find completely unfair and untrue. Nolan having such a respected name in film would not have just given him the part if he felt he was undeserving, putting his own name on the line. Why is it so hard to believe that someone of such popularity in the music industry like Harry, could expand their horizons into a different form of media and be just as deserving of a role as someone who only acts? Just like any other up and coming actor, Harry worked hard and earned his spot in the film as anyone else would have had to. And why would this be such a bad thing anyway? We should always encourage everyone to express themselves in any outlet that makes them happiest. We must not disclose people to doing their one thing. When you put these chains on people it suppresses their dreams and creativity. Everyone should be given a chance to follow their heart. This concept shouldn't change just because of his name, he is still a person deserving of a fair shot to prove himself.

DUNKIRK TRAILER
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-eMt3SrfFU

While this movie has given Harry an opportunity to rebrand himself in a more serious environment, I know he will remain true to himself, the boys, his fans, and his passions. He has always encouraged the rest of the world to do whatever makes them happiest, it is time that the world does the same for him.

I am so incredibly proud of him in every way possible. I have watched him grow into the person he is over the past almost 7 years, and I can't wait to see what this new chapter has in store for him.

Love to all❥

Alexa

STYLE DIARY: should I stay or should I go?

Today has been a very cold and casual day for me, I just had work and some Christmas shopping to finish up, so I just wanted to dress comfortable and warm. The jacket is my favorite part of this outfit, and I only paid $12 for it at Goodwill. Thrifting is my favorite option especially when shopping for jackets and jeans, there are always such good finds. Also I definitely could've passed as an extra in Stranger Things which I love!

OUTFIT DETAILS

top - Forever 21

jacket - Goodwill

jeans - Forever 21

boots - Doc Martens

I plan to do these outfit of the days very often, I hope you all enjoyed and had a lovely day!!!

See you soon, Love to all❥

Alexa

Welcome to LushAlexa

Hi!!! Welcome to my very first blog post ever! I am so excited to be writing this!! For a long time now I have considered a wide range of outlets to express myself and my creativity, including youtube and other media sites. Although I really enjoy creating and uploading content to my youtube channel, I feel as though it puts a heavy strain on my personal schedule, and that it disconnects me from real life experiences. I find it incredibly important to be completely present in life, but having to worry constantly about whether or not I got enough footage for the vlog I was filming really takes me out of those moments. After quite some time attempting to enjoy uploading regularly on my youtube channel I just couldn't fake it anymore. I decided to finally create this blog, my ideal platform, where I will express myself and my passions while still being present in life and fully experiencing it in the moment.

I still plan to upload on my youtube channel when necessary. For example, I will upload videos to go along with posts on here, or when I am able to set aside time to plan and film I will upload, but for the most part 'lushalexa' will continue here.

I am thrilled for anyone reading this to follow me on my journey.❥

If you made it this far, HELLO!!! My name is Alexa Fajardo, I am 19 years old, and currently based in Olympia, WA. I am absolutely in love with falling in love with just about everything. Working takes up a great portion of my life in attempts to save for university, but we all know how hard it is to save money... When I am not working I love to binge watch my favorite TV shows, cry about Harry Styles (shocker), read personal style/fashion blogs, and more. I have strong views and opinions on political/social topics that I feel very passionately about, and I have no intention of being silent about them. Also, I cry a lot. Like so much that some find it concerning but I LOVE FEELING MY EMOTIONS, completely, heavily, and to their full extent. 

For now that is enough about me, believe me when I say there will be plenty to learn about me as this journey furthers. 

As this is my first post I also want to give you a small glimpse of what my blog will be about!

MY PERSONAL STYLE

I don't like to put any boundaries on how I dress, I wear whatever I like regardless of what others will think, or whether or not it is 'in'. The idea of trends has always been something that I struggled with as I feel it puts your personal style into a box, rather than just wearing what makes you happy. I plan to regularly include my outfits, pieces I have been loving, hauls, and just about anything else regarding my sense of fashion in this blog.

GIRLHOOD

Girl adolescence is confusing in the most frustrating ways because of the constructs that we inherit growing up. We constantly have things being enforced on us, how they want us to look, what we can and cannot wear, how to make everyone happy, to apologize when we don't need to. The list could go on full of flaws that we endure on a daily basis. But what is nice about it all is that social media has helped give girls (like myself) a platform to fight back and be heard. People are slowly realizing that girlhood is open ended, there are countless ways to be a girl. There is something about girlhood and sisterhood that is so important and so special to me.

THINGS I LOVE

My life and all of the things I love that make me, me. Traveling is something I am very passionate about, especially traveling for concerts. I want to share my experiences and thoughts first hand of the many places I travel to and the concerts I attend. Adding on to what I said earlier, I love all things GIRL POWER (who doesn't??) and I read quite a bit about it. Book, TV show, music, and movie reviews and recommendations will be something you will also be able to find on this blog in the future!

HARRY STYLES

My favorite person in the entire universe of course will be making plenty of appearances here. I have always loved and felt so connected to the person that Harry is. His musical abilities, his killer style, the way he thinks, his values, his beliefs, his activist qualities, his support for minorities, his kindness. He has been such an influential person in my life in multiple ways, I find so much happiness, love and inspiration in him. He is my person.

MY INSPIRATIONS

There are so many people who I look up to in many aspects of my life. It was difficult selecting a few to showcase on this post, but it gives a good glimpse of who and what I am majorly inspired by. The theme happens to be strong women with strong beliefs and bonus happen to have such aesthetically pleasing styles. I adore reading and talking about who and what my influences are.

MY DREAMS

I am a dreamer and a hopeful person, my mind and heart never stop wandering. I love talking about the beauty in places I have never been, and what it will feel like when I go there one day. I dream of fashion school abroad and Europe and world peace and coffee shops in London and fashion shows and working with Vogue and Paris and falling in love and I will never stop dreaming, ever.

This is just a small look into something big, an entrance into my mind and my heart. 

I am constantly growing and changing my mind and falling in and out of love with so many things.

Thank you to those who have supported me in every path that life has taken me. If you get anything out of this blog, I hope that it will make you feel something. 

See you soon, Love to all❥

Alexa